I have recently been looking to purchase a car, when I came across a great deal online. First I sent in an inquiry from the Kijiji website to maria28johnson@yahoo.com asking for more information about the “to good to be true” car deal she had posted. She was selling a fully loaded 2002 Honda Accord with leather in PERFECT condition for $4000. Generally these cars sell for from $7000 to $16000 depending on condition.

Please note that any language within the quotes from the e-mails of maria28johnson@yahoo.com do not reflect the views and/or opinions of myself or anyone else posting to this website.

Here is the first reply I got:

Hi,
I’m Maria,let me know if you’re still interested my car is 2002 Honda Accord,never been involved in a accident, no damage, no scratch, no rust and i can say that this car is in perfect condition and you will love this car if you will decide to move forward.
The price is not negotiable $4000 firm,I sell at this price because I just finished the divorce with my husband. When the divorce has finished I own this car. Now as a women I don’t need.
I’ve got photos of the car hosted on Internet at the following link:http://s399.photobucket.com/albums/pp74/Honda-Accord_photo/
Thanks.

So I replied to “Maria” with the following: Read more »

When I went to the Canadian International Air Show at Ontario place last year with my dad, they didn’t have many seats on the rooftop patio. Actually, I don’t think they had any, because everyone was standing. This makes it rather difficult to see if you’re in a wheelchair, like my dad, and are positioned anywhere but the front row.

This year they had lots of chairs, all the way to the front row. We managed to get a spot about three or four rows form the front. “Oh good,” I thought, “my dad will be able to see everything.” What I didn’t count on was the ignorance and stupidity of the numerous douchebags who would promptly forget about their seats whenever the announcer directed the audience’s attention to a new airplane.

This guy was a rather slow-looking douchebag. You can see by his size that he is quite effective at standing in the way of whatever you’re trying to look at.

A few more douchebags, demostrating their view-blocking stance.

This guy was by far the biggest douchebag of them all. He was standing right in front of my dad, and completely ignored our calls to sit down. You, sir, are an asshole. Fuck you.

Next year I’m bringing an unignorable megaphone so I can loudly point out that some of us can’t stand. Kindly sit down or GTFO.

In front of Toronto Union Station you can always find a row of taxis populating the taxi stand. The taxi stand is clearly identified by the sign at the bottom of the picture below. But if you look up a little, you will also find a sign that reads, “NO SOLICITING TAXI FARES”:

You’ll notice that there are no arrows on the No Soliciting sign, which means that it applies equally in both directions, including the taxi stand. So, how is this supposed to work, exactly? Does this mean free taxi rides to Union? You could get in a cab, be driven to Union Station, and then point out this sign when the cabbie asks for his fare. And then you can find yourself on the nightly news as the latest victim of cabbie rage. You can thank me later for your 15 minutes of fame.

Continuing right along with the inadvertent Fail theme, here’s a messed up ATM that Kittynne found:

Unfortunately the screen was not responsive, so I couldn’t reprogram it to make it spit out cheeseburgers instead of cash. Yeah, my priorities are whacked, but it would be pretty funny to see the looks on people’s faces when they get cheeseburgers instead of cash.

A couple days ago we saw what happens when you combine a questionable company name with an equally questionable web page design. Today we will examine what happens when you don’t proof your section banner:

This is so obvious, I have to wonder if it was done on purpose so that people like me would go, “OMG! These guys are browsing porn while working on the Divine mother icon!”

Here’s the link to the actual web page. What do you think? Is it a mistake or is it a marketing ploy?

There are a lot of new and questionable drugs being marketed at us every day. The TV commercials are ridiculous, because even if you can figure out what the hell the drug is supposed to do for you, you’ll have second thoughts after being bombarded with the laundry list of side effects.

But what if the side effects were better than the drug itself? Let’s take a look:

Hmm, almost makes me want to get genital herpes.

Nah.

Picking a name for your business is something that requires serious thought. I mean, you don’t want to pick a name that is going to be misinterpreted in a negative light. And even if you screw that up, you want to make sure that your questionable company name is distanced as far as possible from anything associated with said negative connotation.

Well, these guys didn’t do that:

Please tell me I’m not the only one who sees the problem here.

I received a strange envelope in the mail today. It was unaddressed and it read, “Find your partner inside!!!”.

I knew the envelope wasn’t intended for me since I didn’t have a partner. But then I started thinking, what kind of partner could fit into an envelope? It seemed rather ridiculous to me that you could open an envelope and expect your partner to fall out. Sure, maybe you could pull that off with wormholes, but I don’t think our scientists have quite mastered the nature of wormholes yet, let alone finding a partner to shove into one.

Then I started thinking… maybe it was like Sea-Monkeys. Sea-Monkeys and astronaut ice-cream. They both require water to be added and both contain hyphens, so I figured I was onto something. I was also a bit hungry.

Unfortunately, adding water to the envelope only resulted in a small puddle and a bit of papier-mâché. I decided to make the best of the situation and formed the papier-mâché into a little person and stuck it in my neighbour’s mailbox.

Easy come, easy go.

Continuing with the theme of “hey, here’s a funny video that I’ll post instead of coming up with original content,” here’s the Awkward Rap:

Oh great. These widescreen videos don’t fit the confines of my blog’s theme. Meh, whatever. You didn’t notice anyway.

Friends, it has been brought to my attention that the U.S. government is apparently doing *something* to their water supply and their air supply. I have been directed to video evidence of a phenomenon that inarguably confirms this. The commentary you are about to hear makes the facts absolutely clear:

Insane Rainbow Conspiracy Lady – Watch more free videos

Let’s summarize the key facts that can be gleamed from this video:

• Metallic iodized salts in the water supply and in the oxygen supply are responsible for creating the rainbow effect in sprinklers;
• Something is oozing out of the ground that allows this type of effect to happen;
• Rainbows used to only be observed around the sun and the moon;
• Now, everywhere we look, the visible spectrum is rainbows;
• Rainbows in sprinklers cannot be natural because it wasn’t something that happened twenty years ago;
• This phenomenon is a sign that “they” will take away your constitutional rights and your human rights;
• These rainbows are happening because of the government’s never-ending thirst for energy sources.

Perhaps the most important fact to take away from this is that an uneducated, paranoid mind can often be the source of unwitting entertainment.